KING VLAD THE MAD

VLADIMIR ROMANOV stepped down from an open top bus yesterday then climbed on his high horse to denounce everyone he claims is doing Hearts down.

The club owner was crowned King of Edinburgh by delighted Jambos as he and his team paraded the Scottish Cup in front of 200,000 fans.

He was feted by a crowd of around 13,000 inside Tynecastle as skipper Steven Pressley led a lap of honour with the trophy amid emotional scenes as the whole of Gorgie came to a standstill.

But there was little cheer later on as Romanov reflected on his first season in charge.

He addressed the media inside Tynecastle with chairman son Roman acting as interpreter.

And in a graceless and meanspirited attack, he failed to even congratulate the players for their efforts after they finished second in the SPL and won the Scottish Cup for the first time in eight years.

Romanov rounded on enemies within Hearts as well as those on the outside - the "parasites" he reckons have prevented the Jambos fulfilling their true potential in the last 10 months.

Targets included player agents, referees, the media, other "organisations and institutions" which undoubtedly include the SFA, and even some of his top-team stars.

Andy Webster, who missed the celebrations after being overlooked for a place in the Cup Final squad, was accused of not trying hard enough to declare himself fit to face Rangers last week.

Rudi Skacel was told he can leave but there's no way he'll be allowed to join a "mediocre" outfit.

And Romanov refused to confirm if coach Valdas Ivanauskas will even be part of the club next season.

Even yours truly and Record Sport got it in the neck for daring to reveal there are alternative therapists - known as Rima and Pyjama Man - working behind the scenes at Riccarton.

The only people who escaped Romanov's wrath were the Hearts fans and he promised to deliver on their potential because it would be a crime to overlook it.

In bizarre scenes, Romanov, kitted out in suit and tie, played kickabout on the pitch with his son and a group of Hearts supporters who had sneaked back into Tynecastle for a quick look after the clean up had begun following an afternoon to remember for fans.

He looked a mean striker on the field and is clearly a fearsome attacker off it, as he highlighted as soon as he was asked if the achievements of the team had met his expectations this season.

Romanov said: "When this team was built it was built to win the championship but I did not expect the systematic resistance from our whole surroundings.

"We wanted to catch Rangers and Celtic but then Celtic managed to pull away. However, we also didn't expect to be beaten from the back by different persons and organisations and never expected to be hit below the belt.

"It's not appropriate in this country, especially from referees who see everything well on the pitch.

"It's also the whole system that makes money from football and doesn't want to lose their business.

"I'll be ready for them next year. I'll seal my packet so no one can take anything from it and spend my money concentrating on my team. There's a lot of work to do." Romanov was asked if the season had brought him a lot of joy for his investment.

He said: "It was my worst nightmare and I did not expect to see that, especially from reporters and the media."

Romanov went on: "In the capital of Scotland, there is no stadium to compare with those in Glasgow.

"But there is also no institution that could somehow criticise and punish referees who make mistakes.

"Agents are also manipulating players and all this information is cheating fans.

"The media should maybe cover these issues and not make sensations out of Pyjama Man and things like that. But I suppose everyone writes to their own intellect."

Asked about the future of Ivanauskas, there was a pause as long as the procession that had taken Romanov from the City Chambers to Tynecastle over the previous two hours.

He said "There is a saying, 'Hope is always the last thing to die'. If I say he is staying, you'll say he's a dead coach. If I fire him, you'll say he is a good one.

"I think perhaps you want Rix back - you are welcome to him. Will Ivanauskas be here next season? Time will tell." Romanov has built a squad at Tynecastle that needs selective pruning if they are to make the Champions League group stages next season.

It is widely recognised there are too many players, some of whom will be given the chance to shine next season and others who will leave after failing to make an impact.

However, unless there is a dramatic U-turn, it seems certain Skacel and Webster have both kicked their last ball for the club.

Romanov said: "Ask Webster's agent about the situation with the player. Too often agents make the decisions for players, when to play and not to play, for instance.

"I don't know where Andy was today, but the bigger news for me was that he was not available to play against Rangers in our last league game.

"We did not have a central defender that day who could defend so well but as a result of some little injury he was out of shape for two weeks.

"It's up to him but my medical staff, including Pyjama Man - who washes his hands after he goes to the restroom and who wears medical clothes - gave a different opinion of Andy's injury."

Skacel is wanted by a string of clubs in England, with former boss George Burley particularly keen to sign him for Southampton, but Hearts have him under contract for two more years.

The Czech star told fans yesterday he had played his last game for the club but Romanov has told him he is going nowhere without his say-so.

He said: "If Rudi wants to go to a club he likes and it's a good club then he can go if they make the opportunity available to him.

"However, if he is being twisted to move to mediocre clubs by an agent we won't let it happen."

The only people Romanov seemed to have a good word for were the Hearts fans. He said: "I've said many times before, and not too many people can see it, but Hearts fans are national treasures.

"It's difficult anywhere to find fans like that and to not fulfil the full potential of these national treasures and to waste it is a crime."

Romanov departed the scene five minutes later with smiles and handshakes all round for the male reporters and fatherly kisses for the females. He doesn't half boast a vice-like grip. But that's something anyone at Hearts could have told you months ago.

Taken from the Daily Record