MY MISSUS CALLED AFTER SEEING ME STRESSED OUT ON TV.

THE tin on his desk opens. Another tiny Cafe Creme cigar pops into Graham Rix's mouth and he sparks up.

"I know, I KNOW, the ban's coming!" he protests as his face cracks into a grin and a cloud wafts up against the pale blue brieze block walls of his Riccarton office.

"I DO need to stop. We've a hypnotherapist here helping the guys with positive thinking.

"But every time I've made an appointment to see her another bloody crisis kicks off in here!

"I feel like the guy McCroskey from Airplane: 'Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking'!"

At least Rix doesn't have to go cold turkey on the amphetamines and glue sniffing like Lloyd Bridges did - but you get his point.

The Hearts coach has managed only 16 games since he walked into the crosshairs almost permanently trained on the Tynecastle dugout.

But it must feel like he has done a lifetime's worth of firefighting in those 110 days.

From the euphoric highs of a derby win to the plunging lows of owner Vladimir Romanov's team interference and the fallout that followed, even a man with Rix's life experiences admits they've taken their toll.

"My missus Linda saw me on the telly a couple of weeks ago," he reflected. "She phoned from Southampton and said: 'Get yourself home. NOW. You look absolutely terrible.'

"I speak to her a few times a day but she didn't realise just how much stress I've been under.

"And even Jim Duffy said: 'Ricko, get on a plane'."

Which he did. Down to Hampshire, a place he refers to as his sanctuary.

But Rix insists he never considered making it a one-way ticket. Even during Hearts' traumatic trip to Tannadice 19 days ago that sparked a rain forest's worth of headlines it never crossed his mind.

Most people would find that hard to believe. Bad enough his team selection was taken out of his hands, with Andy Webster and Robbie Nielson glaring absentees from Scotland's meanest defence.

But to then be forced to endure day after day of being asked if he was man enough to chuck it?

"I never even contemplated it," Rix said adamantly. "Listen, that night at Tannadice, I couldn't say anything. And even now I can't.

"But all the tape machines thrust at you, all the questions shouted in your ear?

It's never been my style to try to conceal stuff so I found it tricky, very stressful.

"I've seen in the media 'Rix should walk away'. But they don't understand what's going on here.

"I speak to my players every day, individually, in small groups, whatever.

I want them to get their rewards this season. They deserve it, even for what they've done already.

"And without being big-headed their best chance of doing so is by me staying, not for anything I've done but they don't need any more upheaval."

They've had their fair share. From George Burley's whirlwind reign, George Foulkes' and Phil Anderton's shock baggings, running battles with the SFA, the arrival and giddy promotion of Jim Duffy, the square-up between players and owner over who picks the team.

It's hard to remember when they've been back page news for their exceptional work ON the park. But if you expected to find staff looking over their shoulders and waiting for the next knife to plunge, you'd be wrong.

In the 20 minutes I'm waiting for Rix to finish an interview for a documentary on Romanov - an officially sanctioned film this time - I bump into Jim Stewart, John McGlynn, Jim Duffy, Stevie Frail and Campbell Ogilvie.

There's no cloud hanging over them, no look of brow-beaten oppression.

Instead it's laughs and warm handshakes all round - although you detect a kind of 'welcome to the madness' camaraderie there. "The place is buzzing, " Rix agrees, although he admits relations with the man tagged Mad Vlad aren't easy.

"The language IS a problem and I'm sure he'd agree.

No matter how good the interpreter is there can still be misunderstandings.

"I'd love to be able to take Vladimir out for a meal and chat about football for five hours, but the language barrier means it'll never happen.

"But I have to say he has stood by me.

"First he gave me the chance and second, when the flak was flying at the start, he told me: 'Don't worry, I'll protect you'.

"And let's not forget - he's the boss."

It's not the first time Rix has been in this situation. As gaffer of Portsmouth he had the control freak instincts of Milan Mandaric to deal with and a director of football in Harry Redknapp.

So are there similarities? The Jambos gaffer paused before saying: "They both want to be heavily involved in all aspects of the club so I suppose so.

"But now I have a director of football here who's supportive and on my side.

"I brought Duff here to coach with me - the reserves, the academy, the schoolboys.

He was going to do all that.

"And the fact they've made him director of football? I'm in heaven.

"People have said that undermined me but it was the opposite. He's a mate. I trust him absolutely.

"Jim has already said I'm the gaffer and what I say goes. People raised eyebrows when he was in the dugout but he asked me where I wanted him to sit and I didn't bring him here to sit in the stand."

Duffy has been an essential part of Rix's support system for years but the boss admits the fact he's here at all is down to wife Linda's unstinting backing.

Rix endured a torrid time in the job market for two years, with chairmen more inclined to make moral rather than football judgments on him for his conviction for unlawful sex with an under-age girl.

And he got to the point where he thought his CV, including 400-plus Arsenal appearances, 17 England caps and an eight-year spell as first-team coach at Chelsea, had become worthless.

Rix sighed: "For 18 months I was sat on my a**e, watching Sky Sports News to see if a manager or coach would be sacked and wondering if I maybe had a chance of a job.

"I must have driven my wife mad but she has been mega supportive.

"And she was actually responsible for my biggest turning point.

"I went to Jody Morris' wedding last summer. Just before it - because I couldn't get back in the game - I'd said: 'I've had enough. I'll drive a cab. I have to do something before I go mad'.

"So anyway, the two of us are standing at the bar at the wedding and there's Jody, John Terry, Rio Ferdinand, Frank Lampard, Michael Duberry.

"And they're all asking: 'Ricko, why aren't you in the game?' "Obviously I've got a good idea why not but they believed something would come for me.

"And when they drifted off Linda said: 'There's no way you're driving a cab. If all those guys believe you've something to offer football you must have faith.'

"Because guys like that, all hardened pros, England stars, some of 'em? They don't do platitudes."

Rix has his self belief back now - and his hands full.

With eight fresh faces coming in on deadline day alone he has a squad of 35 to keep happy - but insists he won't be tinkering.

He said: "Gordon, Nielson, Pressley, Webster, Fyssas. We've the best defensive record in the league - they're a team within a team.

"Look at Chelsea. They've 22 internationals.

Every week there's Cech, Carvalho, Terry, Gallas, Del Horno, with Makelele and Lampard - the backbone of the team doesn't change."

So how do you square that with what happened at Tannadice? A question met with a wry grin, a glance at the recorder and a shrug. And a stretch across the desk for the Cafe Creme tin.

Taken from the Sunday Mail